Description[]
Freddy Fazbear vs Foxy vs Bonnie vs Chica! Who is the best animatronic of Freddy Fazbear's Pizza?
Interlude[]
Wiz: Freddy Fazbear, Foxy, Bonnie, Chica. They were built to entertain children at the ripoff of Chuck E. Cheese, Freddy Fazbear's Pizza.
Boomstick: But it's a different story for the security guards. At night, the animatronics hunt em' down and try and stuff em' in suits.
Wiz: Their greatest advantage is their stealth and teamwork. But on their own, which animatronic is deadliest?
Boomstick: And more importantly, which one will get to stuff the security guard? He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle.
Freddy Fazbear[]
Wiz: Freddy Fazbear is the main attraction of Freddy Fazbear's Pizza.
Boomstick: Freddy Fazbear is not only the one who sings in the animatronic band, but he's also the one who will give you nightmares.
Freddy Fazbear's jumpscare in the first game is shown.
Boomstick: JESUS CHRIST! Ahem, anyway, Freddy Fazbear's signature weapon is... a microphone? Seriously?
Wiz: Freddy Fazbear also seems to have the ability to teleport. Don't believe us? Well, look at this.
The player closes the doors, but Freddy Fazbear still manages to kill him.
Boomstick: HOW DID YOU GET IN THERE?! I'm sleeping with a shotgun tonight!
Wiz: Freddy Fazbear is probably the most dangerous of the animatronics, as he hides in the dark and moves really quickly. In fact, he is not only the most dangerous animatronic in the game, but even the leader of his own band.
Boomstick: Thought the bear from The Fox and the Hound was scary? Well, if that bear doesn't give you nightmares, this bear definitely will.
Freddy Fazbear's jumpscare in the second game is shown.
Foxy[]
Wiz: Foxy is the pirate animatronic fox that lives in Pirate Cove.
Boomstick: And believe us, everyone loves this guy, so if he loses, may God help us.
Wiz: Foxy is easily the fastest of the group, being able to sprint down the hall when you least expect it.
Boomstick: And like the other animatronics, he apparently has the ability to teleport. And because he's a pirate fox animatronic, he has a hook for a right hand, although it doesn't seem to have much purpose.
Wiz: Not only is Foxy the fastest of the group, but he easily has the scariest design. He has sharp teeth which can puncture human flesh. In fact, it was commonly theorized that Foxy was the animatronic responsible for an incident dubbed The Bite of '87.
Boomstick: You see, in 1987, an animatronic bit down on a customer's frontal lobe. Turns out it was Fredbear, as confirmed by the Night 5 Minigame of Five Nights at Freddy's 4. Nice try, theorists.
Foxy's jumpscare in the second game is shown.
Boomstick: HEY! I wasn't making fun of you! I was making fun of the theorists!
Bonnie[]
Wiz: The most active animatronic in the first night is Bonnie.
Boomstick: And they get his gender wrong every time. I mean, how would you feel if someone thought you were a chick, although you didn't look and sound remotely like one?
Wiz: Bonnie apparently has the ability to teleport like the other animatronics and can even disable the left door.
Bonnie disables the left door, while the player clicks the "light" button multiple times.
Boomstick: You... fucking... son of a-
Bonnie's jumpscare in the first game is shown.
Boomstick: -BITCHY BITCH BITCH WHO IS CONSTANTLY MISTAKEN FOR A CHICK AND DESERVES TO HAVE A PIZZA SHOVED UP THEIR ASS!
Wiz: Finally, Bonnie wields a...
Boomstick: He wields a what?
Wiz: ...aaaaaaaa guitar.
Boomstick: Say that again?
Wiz: Bonnie wields a guitar.
Boomstick: I can't wait for the next battle so we can analyze an opponent who has awesome weapons. (excited) And I can't wait to finally beat this night! It's 4 AM, so that means it's two more hours and I'll finally...
Bonnie's jumpscare in the first game is shown.
Boomstick: NOOOOOOOOO, F**K, F**K, F**K! THAT F**KING BUNNY SON OF A BITCH! I HATE THIS F***KING GAME! SCOTT CAWTHON, YOU ARE AN ANUS!
Chica[]
Boomstick: Now THAT right there is a chick! Sadly, she doesn't have a pussy, so no children for you.
Wiz: Out of all the animatronics, Chica is the least active.
Boomstick: Once again, like the other animatronics, Chica apparently has the ability to teleport. She can also disable the right door, similar to Bonnie.
Wiz: Chica shows her second pair of teeth more than the other animatronics. Some people even theorize that it is human teeth. She can be stopped by closing the right door when she gets close. But she makes up for that flaw by being the most dangerous animatronic chicken in history.
Beat
Wiz: Uh, Boomstick? It's time for the fight.
Boomstick: Shh, quiet Wiz! It's 4 AM so that means two more hours and I'll finally...
Chica's jumpscare in the first game is shown.
We hear a gunshot sound.
Boomstick: KISS MY ASS, I HATE THIS GAME! IT'S F***KING HORRIBLE!
Announcement[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all.
Boomstick: IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!
DEATH BATTLE![]
Freddy Fazbear teleports to the East Hall corner of the pizzeria. The security guard checks the camera, but Freddy Fazbear doesn't move. As the security guard lowers the monitor, Freddy Fazbear abruptly screams in his face. Then Foxy, Bonnie and Chica enter the office. The powers runs out, trapping them in the office.
FIGHT!
Bonnie tries to punch Chica, but Chica grabs Bonnie's fist and punches him in the chest. She then tackles Bonnie. Bonnie pushes Chica off with his feet and gets up. Chica tries to punch Bonnie, but Bonnie grabs Chica's fist. The two grapple for a few seconds until Chica releases Bonnie and punches him. Chica then punches Bonnie back before grabbing his ears. Bonnie punches Chica, forcing her to let go. Bonnie grabs Chica's neck, but Chica kicks Bonnie in the crotch. Bonnie retaliates by teleporting behind Chica and tackling her from behind. Bonnie gets up and kicks Chica onto her back and stands over her. He gets on his knees and grabs Chica's beak and pries it open, breaking it. Bonnie gets up and turns to face Foxy. Foxy tries to bite Bonnie, but Bonnie shields his face with his arm. He frees his arm from Foxy's jaws and punches him in the stomach. Foxy angrily bites on Bonnie's chest, but Bonnie teleports and grabs the fan and throws it at Foxy. He then teleports in front of his and punches him. Foxy screams angrily and teleports behind Bonnie and grabbing his ears and kicks him in the back, tearing his ears off. As Bonnie gets up, Foxy runs up to him and bites on his chest and tears a chuck of metal from his chest, exposing the wires. Foxy tears out Bonnie's wires as Bonnie collapses. Now it's just Freddy Fazbear and Foxy. Foxy runs at Freddy Fazbear, but Freddy Fazbear teleports behind him and stabs him in the back with his microphone. Foxy teleports behind Freddy Fazbear and bites on his back. But Freddy Fazbear teleports. Foxy searches for Freddy Fazbear. Freddy Fazbear then teleports behind him and impales his neck with his microphone. He then twists the microphone, twisting Foxy's neck in the process. Foxy collapses.
K.O.!
Results[]
Boomstick: Now you're free to play dress up, Freddy.
Wiz: Foxy may have the edge in speed, but as I said, Freddy Fazbear is the leader of his own band.
Boomstick: Rememeber when Leonardo won out in TMNT Battle Royale? Well, imagine that battle except the combatants were killer animatronics.
Wiz: Chica didn't have a hope in this battle. She is the least active animatronic and lacks a weapon. Foxy was able to beat Bonnie thanks to his superior speed.
Boomstick: Then why couldn't he beat Freddy Fazbear?
Wiz: Well, not only is Freddy Fazbear the leader of his own band, but the animal he is based on is easily the most dangerous of all the other animals that the other animatronics are based on.
Boomstick: "Oh, but Foxy has a hook! Freddy only has a microphone! Nyah nyah!"
Wiz: Well, as it turns out, Freddy Fazbear's microphone actually trumps Foxy's hook.
Boomstick: Don't believe us? Well, since a normal hook is curved, not straight, Foxy could not use it as a weapon, while Freddy Fazbear could always use his microphone to make Foxy's ears bleed.
Wiz: Um, robots don't have blood, Boomstick.
Boomstick: Shut up, Wiz. Foxy, Bonnie and Chica just couldn't bear this fight.
Wiz: The winner is Freddy Fazbear.
Advantages & Disadvantages[]
Freddy Fazbear[]
+ Bear>>>Fox>>>Rabbit>>>Chicken
+ Is the leader of his own band
+ Microphone trumps Foxy's hook
+ Teleportation abilities would aid him a lot
- Foxy's speed counters stealth
Foxy[]
+ Fox>>>Rabbit>>>Chicken
+ Fastest of the four
+ Teleportation abilities would aid him a lot
- Fox<<<Bear
- Hook is useless
- Is not the leader of the band
Bonnie[]
+ Rabbit>>>Chicken
+ Actually has a weapon
+ Teleportation abilities would aid him a lot
- Is not the leader of the band
- Rabbit<<<Fox<<<Bear
Chica[]
+ Teleportation abilities would aid her a lot
- Lacks a weapon
- Is not the leader of the band
- Chicken<<<Rabbit<<<Fox<<<Bear
- Least active of the animatronics
Next Time[]
Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle!
A man with a burnt face walks through a forest at night. He sees a page hanging on a tree and grabs it. He turns around to see what appears to be a human with a white blank face.